Advanced Math For Dummies

Teacher promised an extra 10 points if I nailed this analysis just right. So, here goes:

This exercise will be for the sake of argument only. Any resemblance to any individual, or to any organization, is not accidental, simply purposeful.

In 2007, US auto owners used 142 billion gallons of gasoline to power their way to work, to play, and to wherever else they chose to travel. As we have learned, 2008 has proven to be a very expensive year for any kind of travel. This is due to rapidly rising crude oil costs this year. 58 percent of the cost of a gallon of gas reflected the cost to purchase the crude itself in 2007. Next, 27 percent of the cost of a gallon of gas during that period was spent to market, and distribute the gasoline product. Within that 27 percent, was the cost to refine, and the profit for shareholders also. Federal, state, and local taxes accounted for the remaining 15 percent.

Understanding the proportions of cost, and of profit, are essential to understanding the following:
Doctor Mark J. Perry, professor of economics at Michigan State University, has calculated that one company, Exxon Mobil, will pay 40 billion dollars in income taxes this year. This marks the first time in US history that a major corporation will have paid more than the bottom 50 percent of all US taxpayers in income taxes. Of course, this is noteworthy precisely because Exxon Mobil reported earnings of 11.68 billion dollars in the second quarter of 2008. Predictably, Congressional Democrats fulminated over this obscene display of greed, and some began the chant of enacting a " windfall profits tax" on oil companies. Representative Maxine Waters let the "future cat" out of the bag with her statement that the Federal government should nationalize, or, take over the oil companies.

In fiscal 2008, federal receipts are anticipated to be 2.533 trillion dollars. This reduces to 7.03 billion dollars per day! Compare Exxon Mobil's take of 1.29 million dollars per day, and we begin to wonder just which entity is the largest, and the richest? First, we must qualify the question with the observation that Exxon Mobil, and it's employees, worked hard to earn their share, while the Federal government produced exactly nothing, except tax bills for every American, and for Exxon Mobil as well. Meanwhile, with Congressional Democrats doing everything within their power to cripple America's economy; working with their environmental supporters to see to it that oil companies simply disappear from the landscape. None of this is understandable, nor is any of it in the best interest of America itself. So, why do they do it, why do they persist?

Perhaps there is a parallel available to help explain this contradiction masterminded by Democrats. It is quite a tale, and particularly "Grimm" at that. This "Golden Goose", aka "Big Oil", is won by little Dummling, the youngest of three brothers. Along the way to home, many try to steal a golden feather from the goose, but wind up stuck to each other, aka 'Democrats". Little Dummling eventually wins over the Princess who has never laughed, and of course, they live happily ever after. Little Dummling, known also as the American people, is the big winner, and he along with the Golden Goose continue to work their brand of economic magic. What of the democrats who are stuck together? They must live the rest of their lives stuck not only together, but stuck with the blind greed that motivates their every attempt to steal just one "Golden Feather".

Wouldn't it be utterly pointless to cite any moral here? Dummling isn't quite the simpleton everyone believed him to be, and the Goose? She's just fine, and producing just like always.